


Touch Tone Telephone

by Crab_Lad



Series: Crab's need for clone wars content [22]
Category: Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types
Genre: Agender Echo who uses he/him still, Chatlogs, Demiboy Cody, Fives & Echo are like terrible twins, Fluff and Humor, Gen, Genderfluid Hardcase, Humor, M/M, Non-Binary Fives, Non-Binary Tup, QPP Cody & Rex, QPP Jesse & Kix, Queerplatonic Relationships, Texting, chat fic, god idk how to tag, listen the clones cant ALL be cis
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-11
Updated: 2020-12-18
Packaged: 2021-03-03 06:07:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 14
Words: 8,611
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24120004
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Crab_Lad/pseuds/Crab_Lad
Summary: the 501st + Ahsoka + Cody are in a group chat
Relationships: CC-2224 | Cody & CT-7567 | Rex, CC-2224 | Cody/Obi-Wan Kenobi, CT-21-0408 | Echo & CT-7567 | Rex, CT-27-5555 | Fives | ARC-5555 & CT-7567 | Rex, CT-5597 | Jesse & CT-6116 | Kix, CT-5597 | Jesse & CT-7567 | Rex, CT-6116 | Kix & CT-7567 | Rex, CT-7567 | Rex & Ahsoka Tano, CT-7567 | Rex & CT-5385 | Tup, Hardcase & CT-7567 | Rex, SO MANY MORE hIFUHWJF
Series: Crab's need for clone wars content [22]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1662106
Comments: 181
Kudos: 875
Collections: Fun/Humour/Crack in a Galaxy Far Far Away, Starwarschats





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> OKAY SO tup mentions not being in torrent yet, tup is still a shinie and hasn't painted their armour yet

**_New Chat_ **

_CT-5555 “Fives” added CT-7567 “Captain Rex”, CT-6116 “Kix”, CT-1409 “Echo”, CC-2224 “Commander Cody”, CT-3949 “Hardcase”, CT-5597 “Jesse”, CT-5385 “Tup”, Commander Ahsoka Tano to the chat._

CT-5555: sup fuckers except echo tup and tano

Commander Tano: oh hohohoho nice

CT-7567: i’m. Really not surprised but at the same time. why 

_CT-5555 changed their named to A Five is Speaking_

A Five is Speaking: ill eventually do something funnier i just hate the number

A Five is Speaking: anyway welcome to bullshit

CC-2224: Why am I here

A Five is Speaking: because we love you 

CC-2224: How unfortunate

_A Five is Speaking changed CC-2224’s name to Dad_

_A Five is Speaking changed CT-7567’s name to Mom_

Mom: what

Dad: What

A Five is Speaking: ;)

_A Five is Speaking changed CT-3949’s name to Laserbrain_

_A Five is Speaking changed CT-5385’s name to Baby_

_A Five is Speaking changed CT-5597’s name to Kaysh Mirsh Solus_

_A Five is Speaking changed Commander Tano’s name to Commander Cool_

_A Five is Speaking changed CT-6116's name to Will Kix Your Ass_

_A Five is Speaking changed CT-1409's name to Echo (Echo) ((Echo))_

A Five is Speaking: much better 

Baby: oh !! I’m in here too ??

A Five is speaking: of course you are you sweet little child 

Baby: I’m , not even part of torrent ?

Dad: Neither am I and yet Im still here

Will Kix Your Ass: annnnd mute 

Kaysh Mirsh Solus: :(( kixie 

  
Will Kix Your Ass: fine 

Kaysh Mirsh Solus: !! :) 

Commander Cool: _nice_ hehe

Mom: oh i dont trust that

Commander Cool: whatever do you mean rexster :)

Kaysh Mirsh Solus: me 🤝 tano 🤝 fives 🤝 hardcase

up to no good

_Commander Cool changed Mom’s name to Rexster_

Rexster: god i Hate this Fucking Family 

A Five Is Speaking: you love us

Dad: Haha sucks to suck at least all I have to put up with is Waxer

Will Kix Your Ass: _and general kenobi_

Dad: Dont even 

Laserbrain: oop

Laserbrain: f 

Echo (echo) ((echo)): vh 

Echo (echo) ((echo)): Hello everyone!

A Five Is Speaking: ECHO!!!

Commander Cool: Echo!!

_Rexster changed Echo (echo) ((echo))’s name to Rex’s Favorite_

Rex’s Favorite:

A Five Is Speaking: HEY

Commander Cool: HEY!

Baby: :(( 

Rexster: Sigh

_Rexster changed Baby’s name to Rex’s Baby_

Rex’s Baby: 

Rexster: love you tup’ika 

Dad: Gross affection

Rexster: HEY DONT BE MEAN TO OUR CHILD

Dad: Thats implying that we fucked which ew vod were brothers and also implies that one of us can carry which had implications that I. dont think I like. 

A Five Is Speaking: Gross

Laserbrain: Gross

Will Kix Your Ass: gross

Commander Cool: I could have gone my entire life without seeing that, thanks

_Commander Cool changed the chat’s name to “Cursed Family”_

Commander Cool: I don’t even want to talk about the family tree

Commander Cool: moving on, this chat has a no snitching rule from here on out okay what happens here stays here

Rexster: Sir, yes sir

Dad: Yes, Commander

A Five Is Speaking: _sigh_ fine. 

Commander Cool: SWEET well anyway im the one who put hair dye in Master Skywalker’s shampoo

Laserbrain: Sir, I love you 

Commander Cool: ;) 

  
  
  



	2. Chapter 2

**_Cursed Family_ **

Will Kix Your Ass: i’m. going to throw a fit. 

Dad: What else is new

Will Kix Your Ass: dumbass jesse over here  _ thought you could just bite into a mango, but you CAN’T, and now he’s sick and didn’t even get to the mango. _

Kaysh Mirsh Solus: in my defense i didnt know you couldnt bite into a mango

Commander Cool: 

Commander Cool: it, it must be a human thing

Will Kix Your Ass:  **_What._ **

Commander Cool: well u see i can bite into a mango no problem i eat them all the time!!

A Five Is Speaking: wildin 

Laserbrain: evryday i fall more and mroe in love with you commander, but like, platonically

Will Kix Your Ass: next thing you know, you’re gonna tell me you have echolocation or something

Commander Cool: I do!!

Rex’s Favorite: Oh yeah? Then where am I? 

Dad: Thats-

Will Kix Your Ass: that’s not what echo- you know what fine 

Commander Cool: ur in the mess xoxo

A Five Is Speaking: WOAH

Laserbrain: WOOOOOAHHH

Rexster: Im stuck with a bunch of Idiots

Rex’s Baby: i dont think thats how echolocation works but , that’s still ,,, a useful thing !! i’m sitting next to echo in the mess !!

Rex’s Favorite: I- wow. 

\---

Commander Tano: 

Dad: You good there Commander??

Commander Tano: yeah i just think hes cute uwu i also downloaded a bunch of these emotes 

Commander Tano: i quite like this one 

Kaysh Mirsh Solus: goose goose goose

Dad: I just see a lightsaber nothing else and like an orange thing with two more orange things 

Rexster: do, do you

A Five Is Speaking: oh No

Rexster:  _ KOTE DO YOU FUCKING USE LIGHT MODE _

_ Rexster changed Dad’s name to Heathen, Disgrace, Traitor _

Heathen, Disgrace, Traitor: Thats a little far Rex I wouldnt say im a traitor for my preference

Rexster: I’m Disowning you I cant. No i cant you are Awful I hate You

Heathen, Disgrace, Traitor: Fine at least i still have Fox Wolffe and Bly :(

Rexster: YEAH go run to your ori’vode like a  _ wimp  _

A Five is speaking: i think they gone, sad :(

\---

_ Heathen, Disgrace, Traitor changed their name to Fuck the Jedi Code _

Fuck the Jedi Code: I had to say it if no one would 

Commander Cool: :(((((

Fuck the Jedi Code: Sorry Commander but if the Jedi Code really makes General Kenobi believe that hes not supposed to feel emotions or feel ashamed for feeling emotions and not “releasing them into the Force” Im going to throw hands

Commander Cool: oh yeah no thats fair 

Fuck the Jedi Code: Thank you

Rexster: why the Kriff are you both awake

Fuck the Jedi Code: the war never sleeps so why should i 

Rexster: Codes,,, please,,, sleep

Fuck the Jedi Code: I’m having tea with General Kenobi and then he got sad so I’m making sure he a) feels better and b) actually goes the fuck to sleep before i do

Rexster: valid carry on

Rexster: commander 

Commander Cool: horrifying but also i dont need too much sleep, besides ur up too

Rexster: because the comm notifications get going Off

Commander Cool: so??mute them??

Rexster: why would i do that? If theres an emergency I Will Need Them On

Commander Cool: valid 

Rexster: Blease go to Sleep or I Will Tell Kenobi And Skywalker

Commander Cool:  okok im going to sleep

Fuck the Jedi Code: Bye Commander and Rex go the fuck to sleep too

Rexster: i am i am shut up kote 

Fuck the Jedi Code: >:(

\---

Rex’s Baby: would ,,, it bee too much to ask for my own paint ?? i know im ,,, not exactly a veteran like all of you ,, im not even in torrent but i’d like to paint my armour ,,,,

Rex’s Favorite: I have some paint for you Tupi’ka. You’re always welcome to paint your armour!

Rexster: yeah tup’ika you can 

Rex’s Baby: 

A Five Is Speaking: uwu

\--

_ Fuck the Jedi Code changed their name to Cody _

Cody: Sorry not mad at the Jedi Code anymore anyway 

Cody: Guess what fuckers, I managed to get General Kenobi to t-pose It only took a whole bottle of Corellian brandy

A Five Is Speaking: KING

Laserbrain: fewufihewui

Will Kix Your Ass: is, is that healthy

Cody: Oh yeah no hes fine I checked with Baby and Apollo first 

Cody: Even Generals deserve to relax sometimes 

Commander Cool: holy shit thats iconic 

Kaysh Mirsh Solus: i applaud you commander well done well done

Kaysh Mirsh Solus: tho is he like, okay

Rex’s Baby: yea ,,

Rex’s Favorite: Cody I don’t think that’s really healthy for him.

Cody: ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯ Hes been sad recently so im just trying to cheer him up the medics okayed it so im sure its fine

  
Rexster: i know something that would cheer him up ;)

Cody: Copanni mirshmure’cye vod?

Rexster: uwu


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> bean thank you for the help with the weapons info dump uwu 
> 
> anyway hardcase might be ooc sorry,,

**_Cursed Family_ **

Rex’s Baby: the vibes are ,,,, 

Kaysh Mirsh Solus: hehe,,, babie,,,

Rex’s Baby: 

Kaysh Mirsh Solus: bab,,

Rex’s Baby: 

Rexster: we love you Tup’ika 

Rex’s Baby:

* * *

Rexster: _ARC TROOPER 5555_

A Five is Speaking: yes captain

Rexster: YOU WANT TO EXPLAIN TO ME WHY MY HAIR IS _GREEN_

Commander Cool: vh in the chat for fives 

Rex’s Favorite: Vh.

A Five Is Speaking: 

Laserbrain: vh

Will Kix Your Ass: vh

Cody: vh

Rex’s Baby: vh

Kaysh Mirsh Solus: vh

A Five Is Speaking: it was nice knowing yall 

_Rexster changed A Five Is Speaking’s name to Family Disappointment_

Rexster: get up there get on top of the fridge

Family Disappointment: this house is a kriffing _NIGHTMARE_

Will Kix Your Ass: and finally… we will know… peace

Rex’s Favorite: Sometimes I can still hear their voice.

Family Disappointment: quIT TELLING EVERYONE IM DEAD

Rex’s Favorite: I still miss them 

Family Disappointment: 

* * *

Laserbrain: can i info odump blease

Rexster: of course vod’ika

Cody: Yeah 

Laserbrain: sweet okay so i was taking stock in the armour because it calms me

Laserbrain: i like to sit down there and like, take stock of everything 

Laserbrain: anyway 

Laserbrain: so like this is information you probably already know 

Laserbrain: but like, captain your dc 17 handblasters hold 50 shots before you need to reload and theyre worth like 1000 credits dc15as have a total of 500 shots in them they weigh roughly 4.15kg and theyre worth 1500 cresdits where as the dc15s are 2200 credits and still have a 500 shot limit at full power but 300 at full ppower the dc15le is the same but, can be customied whereas the dc15 cant really be

Laserbrain: like i said you probably already know all of this but uh those were some weapons i took into stock we also have a lot ogf vibro blaes and daggers and stuff and we have cases upon cases of droid popper which id you didnt know we can actually turn them into bombs if you just pull one wire

Laserbrain: anyway ujhh yeah 

Laserbrain: guns are,, cool 

Laserbrain: but you know what would be cooler ?? if we could paint our guns too !! we would need different apint than we use on our armour tho because the armour is plastoid while the guns are metal so we would need acrylci or oil based paint that specifies that its for metal which, isnt frequent but we would be better off using acrylic paint because oil based takes lovngerto dry and you would need a good quality brush to use for the oil based which! we dont have access to because the dont give us anything worth quality work sadly 

Laserbrain: im sorry for all the typos and the messages fhwhfuihw i got excited

Rex’s Favorite: That’s fascinating Hardcase!! I didn’t know you had to use different paints for different things.

Laserbrain: Yeah !! we cant use waterlcolor on your armour because it woul djust wash right off snce its water based and like its not exactly the best to use for plastic and stuff its better suited for a canvas or somethign acrylic is something we use for our armour but its also not the best because it chips and peels easily its hwy we have to respaiint like every week 

Family Disappointment: the republic give us better shit challenge

Laserbrain: if we wanted good paint for our armour we would beed something ebtter suited for the outdors rathesr than the acrylic stuff we get 

Laserbrain: uh anyway that was two topics huiwhfieuw

Rex’s Baby: ur all good hardcase uwu 

Rex’s Baby: i think it was cool to learn about !!

Laserbrain: hehe

Commander Cool: oh i have some oil based paint im not into art or anything like that i just, sometimes like to paint canvases when im bored if you ever need some hardcase i can give them to you !! master plo keeps giving them to me when he sees me

Laserbrain: oh LIT thanks commander 

Commander Cool: ofc xoxo

* * *

Rex’s Favorite: One of these days, I will push Fives out of an airlock. /j

Cody: What have they done now

Rex’s Favorite: They ate the rest of my dessert. :(

Family Disappointment: IM SORRY I DIDNT KNOW THEY WERE YOURS PLEASE ECHO IM SO SORRY I LOVE YOU 

Rex’s Favorite: Do you guys hear something?

Family Disappointment: 

Commander Cool: damn killed twice in one week

_Commander Cool changed Family Disappointment’s name to Family Disappointment_ _2_

Family Disappointment2: yeah, i deserve that

  
  



	4. Chapter 4

**_Cursed Family_ **

_Rexster changed Commander Cool’s name to Beast_

Beast: friendship ended with rex now wolffe is my new best friend 

Beast: wait

Beast: 

Beast: there we go

Rexster: I hate you

Beast: love u too xoxo

Cody: Am… I missing something

Family Disappointment2: it’s better if you don’t know

Beast: me and wolffe ate raw meat because we were hungry and caught a wild boar

Cody: Ah so nothing new

Rexster: WHAT

Kaysh Mirsh Solus: WHAT

Cody: Yeah Togruta are natural hunters despite having a peaceful colony so Commander’s got fangs sharp enough to catch game like that

Cody: Its actually healthy for Togruta because its how they get their nutrients

Will Kix Your Ass: yeah !! i sometimes have to get raw meat specifically for the commander 

Will Kix Your Ass: wolffe however shouldn’t be eating that because he could get sick

Cody: Tell that to him when he was 5 and took a chunk out of a trainers arm

Rex’s Baby: oh ,,,, wow,,,

Kaysh Mirsh Solus: one fear

Cody: Yeah Wolffe is a feral lil shit hes just now also grumpy

Rexster: god you as a cadet

Cody: Dont you fucking dare

  
Rexster: oh i dar ewoifjwefjepwkoppW WOPFOWF

Beast: sucks to suck i guess

Family Disappointment2: rest in peace captain

Rex’s Baby: DAD NO

Cody: He Won’t Be Talking Anymore

Will Kix Your Ass: please don't hurt him too bad i don't want to be bandaging him up for a third time this week

Laserbrain: cody you really scare me

Cody: good

Kaysh Mirsh Solus: im sorry im still LOSING MY SHIT over commander tanos thing

Beast: ;)

* * *

Rexster: the next time i get thrown im committing treason

Beast: aw dont be like that :((

_Cody changed Rexster’s name to Hacky Sack_

Hacky Sack: I’m gonna murder you 

Cody: then you’ll be stuck with fox wolffe and Bly all on your own

Hacky Sack: oh shit youre right

Hacky Sack: I still hate you

Cody: 

Cody: You also cant commit treason before Fox does or hell kill you

Hacky Sack: fuck youre right 

Hacky Sack: fox commit treason sooner challenge 

Laserbrain: hiur392rwiorjo21wefejwiofjewowef2-03

Kaysh Mirsh Solus: HUIHWIUHIUWHIUFHWIUHFUIW

Rex’s Baby: what if ,,, we ,,, didn’t ? Commit treason ??

Rex’s Favorite: Commiting treason is only fun if you can get a pardon

Rex’s Favorite: Which is why you need a friend in power first, commit treason, and then get pardoned. 

Family Disappointment2: echo, vod, youre my favorite

Rex’s Favorite: Thanks Fives, Tup’s my favorite

Family Disappointment2: D:<

Family Disappointment2: see if i do anything for u now >:(

* * *

Kaysh Mirsh Solus:

Kaysh Mirsh Solus: I AM THE VICTOR 

Cody: of?

Hacky Sack: yeah jess, of what

Will Kix Your Ass: he beat us all at space mario kart 

Hacky Sack: ah

Laserbrain: WAIT YOURE PLAYING SPACE MARIO KART

Family Disappointment2: oh no

Laserbrain: IM ON MY WAY 

Kaysh Mirsh Solus:

* * *

Hacky Sack: hey do you guys wanna know how Cody got his scar

Beast: YEAH

Family Disappointment2: yes

Will Kix Your Ass: yes

Rex’s Favorite: Yes

Rex’s Baby: yes ,,,

Laserbrain: _YES_

Kaysh Mirsh Solus: Y e s 

Cody: _NO REX DONT_

_Hacky Sack removed Cody from_ _Cursed Family_

_Hacky Sack changed their name to RexitRalph_

RexitRalph: okay anyway 

RexitRalph: Cody got his scar falling out of a bunk trying to tickle wolffe

RexitRalph: wait

_RexitRalph added CC-3636 to_ _Cursed Family_

_RexitRalph changed CC-3636’s name to Wolf_

Wolf: fuck you

_Wolf changed their name to Rex is the worst_

Rex is the worst: anyway why am i here

RexitRalph: kote isnt here to defend their honor tell the story of how he got his scar

Rex is the worst: well if im gonna be here to bully kot’ika then the others will too

_Rex is the worst added CC-1010 and CC-5052 to_ _Cursed Family_

_Rex is the worst changed their name to WereWolffe_

_WereWolffe changed CC-5052’s name to The Only Valid Het_

_WereWolffe changed CC-1010’s name to Vice-Chancellor_

The Only Valid Het: hello!

Vice-Chancellor: okay who the fuck is who 

Beast: WOLFFE MY BEST FRIEND

Werewolffe: hey vod’ika 

Beast: Ahsoka !! its ahsoka 

Will Kix Your Ass: Commanders, sirs, welcome

Vice-Chancellor: ah kix

The Only Valid Het: oh! You don’t need to call us commanders uwu

Vice-Chancellor: can yall role call or smth

Kaysh Mirsh Solus: jesse

Rex’s Favorite: Echo!

Rex’s Baby: Tup,,

Family Disappointment2: Fives

Laserbrain: hardcase

RexitRalph: vode welcome to my gang of kids

RexitRalph: we’re here to talk about how kote got his scar

WereWolffe: eggscelent 

Vice-Chancellor: i hate you 

WereWolffe: that’s not new

The Only Valid Het: is, is cody here? 

Family Disappointment2: no but im excited for the story 

WereWolffe: okay well we were uh 4 at the time, and Cody thought it would be a good idea to crawl to my bunk, at the top across from fox’s and try and tickle me like he had seen Jango do with boba 

WereWolffe: well the thing is about me my reaction to tickling is to kick or it was back then so well cody attacked me and i ended up kicking him off the bunk as a reaction. He hit the corner of his own, and like, didnt move for a solid 3 minutes

Vice-Chancellor: Wolffe cried because he thought he had killed Cody

WereWolffe: AND??? You were crying too you little shit you got so pissed at me 

Vice-Chancellor: YEAH OF COURSE I DID 

Vice-Chancellor: anyway i got to witness like three years later Cody taking down jango so 

Vice-Chancellor: even if he was a dumbass cadet, older cody was a BEAST like the younger cadets are terrified of him for good reason

Kaysh Mirsh Solus: heifwuheiuwhfiuehwiuf

Beast: SKSLKLSKLSKLSKLSKlkdlKLDSKDs oHMYGOD

Laserbrain: IM WHEEZING

Will Kix Your Ass: mmnsmnsmnsmnsmansmnsa okay thats funny 

RexitRalph: cant believe you still respect cody smh

Vice-Chancellor: to be fair he’s, frighteningly competent 

The Only Valid Het: can i add him back 

RexitRalph: fine

_The Only Valid Het added CC-2224 to_ _Cursed Family_

CC-2224: REX YOU BITCH

RexitRalph: blocked uwu

CC-2224: wait wait unblock me

RexitRalph: fine

CC-2224: bitch

Vice-Chancellor: you fuckin twink 

CC-2224: oh fuck youre here

CC-2224: WHY CANT I ACCESS EARLIER MESSAGES

Vice-Chancellor: maybe its because you can’t read

_CC-2224 removed Vice-Chancellor from the chat_

_CC-2224 removed WereWolffe from the chat_

_CC-2224 removed The Only Valid Het from the chat_

_CC-2224 changed their name to Cody_

Cody: i have brought peace, justice, freedom to my groupchat

Family Disappointment2: YOUR GROUP CHAT???

Cody: dont make me assign you kp

Family Disappointment2: sir yes sir 

  
  
  



	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this one is shorter than the last one and only has two things to it but i wante dto post

**_Cursed Family_ **

Family Disappointment 2 : hey lets bet on how fast i can get banned from sprindr

Rex’s Favorite: Immediately.

RexitRalph: five minutes

Kaysh Mirsh Solus: three seconds

Will Kix Your Ass: you’ll say one thing to a girl and she’ll ban you

Cody: You wont even get accepted in

Laserbrain: one hour

Beast: i have faith you can last… a day

Rex’s Baby: 

Cody: Oh I forgot theres a baby in the chat

Rex’s Baby: im not baby !!

RexitRalph: yes you are tup’ika

Rex’s Baby: ,, okay ,,, maybe i am baby

RexitRalph: love you ad’ika

Rex’s baby: lov,,, you too buir,,,

Family Disappointment 2 : not to derail from the softness but i wasn’t allowed on because apparently being 11 and human means im not old enough for it

Cody: HAHA

Kaysh Mirsh Solus: kark, when will clone be a galaxy wide recognized species smh 

Rex’s Favorite: Hey hy is the captain weeping?

Rex’s Favorite: I can hear him down the hall 

Rex’s Baby: oh ,,, no ,,,

RexitRalph: IM FINE

* * *

Cody:  _ hey  _ HEy

Cody: HEEEEEEEEEy

RexitRalph: uh

RexitRalph: you good there

Cody: yeah i had some of oak’s moonshine

Will Kix Your Ass: that sounds toxic please

Cody: the general gave me it 

Cody: he said its cuz im stressed or smth 

Cody: but he is!! So we shared he bottle

Will Kix Your Ass: well at least you didnt drink it yourself

Cody: yea

Cody: but the general is passed out in my lap

Cody: his hair is soft

Beast:  thats my grandmaster 

Cody: oop sorry 

Cody: anyway i love you guys 

Cody: hmm Rex !

RexitRalph: uh, yeah? 

Cody: youre,,, good. Im proud of you you went from veery uptight cadet to cool dude youre,,, so good at your job

RexitRalph: thanks,,, thanks cody,,,

Cody: KIZ

Cody: KXI

Cody: KIX

Family Disappointment 2 : there you go

Cody: KIX youre,,,, good at your job !! im impressed by how responssile and effective you are youre a good medic and i wish i could stea you for my own

  
  


Will Kix Your Ass: 

Cody: FIVES 

Cody: youre a littl ehsit but you impress me in the field you may be full of bat shit ideas and like,,, idk you got a screw loose or smth but ur very good on the field its,, impressive how you go from wild little shit to compettnet soldier 

Family Disappointment 2 : i feel like i just got insulted and complimented but i’ll take both

Cody: AHRDACSE

Cody: fuck

Cody: keyboars,,, dsmall

Cody: Hardcase ur next 

Cody: hardcase hardcase hardcase can i just say your,,, art is, ,  ur funny and its cool listening to you infodump about the things youre into or are,, learning yore very passionate and ist cool becaus e it shows that we can ave other interestes than war

Cody: fuck the bottles almost ogne 

Laserbrain: 

Cody: uhTPI

Cody: TUPIKA 

Cody: tup,,, baby ,,, sweet baby child,, i love you youre ,,, good an dim surprised rex hasnt upgraded

Cody: not htas not the right word

Cody: PROMOTEd

Cody: yeah promoted you to torrent you,,, are good at what you do and i loike how nice you are,,, you listen really well and i shoulD know !

RexitRalph: what DOES THAT MEAN

Rex’s Baby: sorry, swore baby’s oath i cannot tell secrets

Cody: hehe love you tupika 

Rex’s Baby: 

Cody: uh echo and kix and haoska aright 

Cody: right eyah i thik so 

Cody: nO I ALREADY DID KIX

Cody: JESSE

Kaysh Mirsh Solus: i see how it is

Cody: NO! 

Cody: jesse !! i se eyou having the potenital for arc training one day yre compeenat soldier and you thin k fast on yoru feet and ur funny and its cool

Kaysh Mirsh Solus: 

Cody: ahsoka 

Cody: you are,,, like a little sister to all of us truely i would die for you youve grown up so much alread y since we firts met and im really impressed and rpoud of the person you are it,,, youre a good one ahsoka tano im glad to have met oyu

Beast: 

Cody: EchO 

Rex’s Favorite: Oh, Force

Cody: echo you are,,, so mrsat 

Cody: smart 

Cody: smart and !! hehe you know how to get around regs and when you bully fives its funny and ur a good arc trooper too im gla you work with us somemesit 

Cody: sometimes 

Rex’s Favorite: 

Cody: anyway now that you guys know i love you im gonna go cuddle with my general 

Cody: hes,, warm 

Cody: and hes cuddling mE 

  
Cody: i love him 

  
  
  



	6. Chapter 6

**_Cursed Family_ **

Cody: I hate all of you

Cody: Next time I’m drunk remove me from the chat

Cody: Better yet chuck me into the nearest sun so I don’t have to speak 

Rex’s Favorite: You actually don’t hate us. You said so last night

Cody: I’m jared, 19 

Family Disappointment 2 : how dare you quote spine

RexitRalph: I’m surprised you know what spine is considering ur old 

Cody: Fuck u

_ RexitRalph changed Cody’s name to Old Man Kote _

Old Man Kote: Rex I hate you so much

RexitRalph: Try me bitch

Old Man Kote: 

Old Man Kote: REX WE ARE THE SAME AGE

Old Man Kote: give or take a few days

RexitRalph: old. Old man. I am at PEAK youth

Old Man Kote: Oh so it wasnt you that cried about finding a white hair? 

Kaysh Mirsh Solus: how the fuck would he see that his hair is already basically white

Old Man Kote: i never said it was on his head

Kaysh Mirsh Solus: I’m going to go bleach my eyes

RexitRalph: yeah well at least I don’t have old man disease. Remeber last week when you asked me what spik spok was

Old Man Kote: If you say one more thing I will break your spine and i dont mean the app

Beast: wow y’all have spines? 

RexitRalph: if you say some shit about togruta again

Beast: togruta dont have spines

RexitRalph: I’m going to kill you and bury your body where they’ll never find it and i wont even be accused of treason because it will be fair and justified

Beast: xoxo 

* * *

Rex’s Favorite: I found a tooka, and he followed me on the ship and now I don’t know what to do 

Rex’s Baby: Tooka !!! 

Rex’s Baby: can ,,, can i come pet it ,,

Rex’s Favorite: Of course you can Tup’ika

Will Kix Your Ass: what are we supposed to do with a tooka

Will Kix Your Ass: we don't have the food for one

Kaysh Mirsh Solus: can’t they,,, eat rations?

Will Kix Your Ass: jess, vod, brother, friend, i love you but 

Will Kix Your Ass: that will make him sick 

Kaysh Mirsh Solus: ah

Laserbrain: we cant,, keep it,,, can we

RexitRalph: no

Old Man Kote: no

Rex’s Baby:  please,, 

RexitRalph: FINE

Beast: 

* * *

Rex’s Baby: spwikihow to handle when someone flirts with you but youre uncomfortable

RexitRalph: excuse me 

Old Man Kote: ad’ika i need their name right now stat please

Laserbrain: I have two glocks and a fist 

Family Disappointment 2 : Im going to commit a crime

Beast: you just have to make an excuse and walk away, it happens all the time. People are. Gross

Rex’s Baby: yeah well uh ,, i can’t exactly leave

Rex’s Baby: its a senator 

Kaysh Mirsh Solus: kix hold my flower im gonna go beat someone up, echo have the regs manual open that will allow me to do this im Fucking Fighting 

Rex’s Baby: its fine !! senator amidala scolded them

Rex’s Baby: well its not fine but

Rex’s Baby: amidala has it

RexitRalph: i love that women so much please tell her i owe her another tea date 

Old Man Kote: ???????? vod ?????

RexitRalph: me and padme get together when im on coruscant to gossip along with her handmaidens 

RexitRalph: mon mothma is there too as well as senator chuichi 

RexitRalph: ahsoka attends sometimes. Senator organa sometimes shows up as well as duchess satine

RexitRalph: wow that was a very counterproductive way of saying who was there

Laserbrain: can’t believe captain goes to girls night

RexitRalph: its fun!!

RexitRalph: I get a lot of gossip between the senators while the ladies paint my nails we also drink really expensive wine and play games like cards against the galaxy and jackbox

RexitRalph: they also like to run their hands through my hair because of how short it is plus theyre all nice so like. I dont see why i should stop going theyre just,, really nice and its fun 

RexitRalph: they dont let me wear my armour tho sometimes they give me outfits for me to try. it sounds awkward but its a lot of fun. Theyre really nice too and actually take the time to get to know me as rex. War talk is banned too

Laserbrain: let me rephrase that

Laserbrain: I CNAT BELIEVE CAPTAIN GETS INTO GIRLS NIGHT I WANT IN 

Beast: hey we should bring everyone here some night, just for like, idk a morale boost padme would love it

Beast: i also think that the girls + bail would love to have you guys around 

Beast: they can also braid your hair tup !! if u wanted

Rex’s Baby:  I would like that,,,

Kaysh Mirsh Solus: oh hell yeah

Kaysh Mirsh Solus: hey why don’t we do our own girls night

Kaysh Mirsh Solus: that sounds like fun

Will Kix Your Ass: i’m interested 

Rex’s Favorite: I Do Not Want To Deal With All Of You Wine Drunk On A Daily Basis

RexitRalph: thats fair echo

Family Disappointment 2 : but that woudl be,,, fun,,,

Laserbrain: yeah what if we did grils night but with limited drinsk 

Old Man Kote: That sounds like a good idea, having a limit but enough that yall can go hogwild

RexitRalph: i will talk to ahsoka about it more and plan it out with padme too

Family Disappointment 2 : FUCK YEAH

Laserbrain: 

* * *

Beast: i want to. Put glue in anakins hair gel 

Beast: that waay when he goes to style it its,, frozen

Beast: srry im v tired

Beast: but hes stupid

Old Man Kote: Is this about how hes super obvious with Amidala

Beast: YEAH

Beast: he, he was talking about her and was like “yeah my wi-ONDERFUL friend” adn i was like :////////

RexitRalph: vod’ika you should get some sleep if youre tired

Beast: im fine !! i jst used the forec too much last missoin 

Will Kix Your Ass: get your ass in the medbay now commander or so help me force i will sedate you

Beast: okay kixie i’ll b there uwu i dont want to make you upest

Will Kix Your Ass: good

Beast: unlike somepeople (cough cough obi-wan) i nkow when i need to be taken car e of

Old Man Kote: If Obi-Wan did that I would literally be so happy

Family Disappointment 2 : “obiwan”? 

Old Man Kote: we're friends shut the fuck up 

Old Man Kote: we have tea every day, we're friends on the first name basis

Old Man Kote: I will fight you 

Family Disappointment2: ;3

  
  
  



	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this one was,,, a struggle to write bc i dissociated for most of the day and couldn't focus on anything but this and that's stretching it. 
> 
> I have some big projects coming up tho !! hopefully can get them out by the end of the week

**_Cursed Family_ **

Laserbrain: hey captin why are you plasyin despacito on repeat? 

RexitRalph: [](https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/709789441073348658/711747893090058262/Screen_Shot_2020-05-17_at_9.03.28_PM.png)

RexitRalph: can’t a man just vibe in peace? 

Old Man Kote: But why Despacito 

RexitRalph: says the guy who routinely listens to sny snoodles 

Beast: KSJSKSKLSKSLKLDKSLDslsKSL SNY SNOODLES? 

Kixs: MNSMNSMNMSNNSMNSMNMSM COMMANdER 

Laserbrain: HUR32rWR@*FHUW*$UEF 

Kaysh Mirsh Solus: IM JIFJIOFIWJFW SNYSNOODLES??????

_ RexitRalph changed Old Man Kote’s name to Sny Snoodles #1 Fan _

Sny Snoodles #1 Fan: fuck you

RexitRalph: nah but im sure your general wouldnt mind

Sny Snoodles #1 Fan: I’m going to rip your skull out and replace it with cotton

Beast: fun fact about togruta !

RexitRalph: keep speaking and i will snap your bones like glow sticks

* * *

Laserbrain: one of these days

Laserbrain: some1 is oging to paint their entire armour in color and we will. Scream 

Laserbrain: also hey hi pronouns today are she/her blease

Kaysh Mirsh Solus: Okay !!

Rex’s Baby: is no one going to acknowledge that she’s right ?? 

Rex’s Baby: some  _ vode  _ paint alot on their armour im surprised no one's painted the whole thing

Laserbrain: YEAH!! And if anything it’ll actually be better for steath than the white becaus with the white we’re jsth super noticebael but if we’re wearing a darker colo r then we wont be as nosticeabel

Laserbrain: noteiceable

Laserbrain: noeiceable 

Laserbrain: NOTICEABLE 

Rex’s Baby: there ya go ori’vod

Laserbrain: i am, trying

Rex’s Baby: youre doing good 

_ Sny Snoodles #1 Fan changed their name to Cody _

Cody: well. Youre lucky enough to have a dark color I am not

Kaysh Mirsh Solus: vh

Rex’s Favorite: vh

Laserbrain: vh

Will Kix Your Ass: vh

RexitRalph: vh

Rex’s Baby: vh

Beast: vh

Cody: yall just like to bully me huh

_ Beast changed the group chat name to  _ _ Bully Cody _

Cody: Fuck u

* * *

Cody: HOLY SHIT IM IN LOVE WITH OBIWAN

Cody: fuck wAIT NO SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT I THOUGHT I WAS MESSAING REX PLEASE IGNORE THAT

Cody:  _ fuck _

_ Cody deleted one message _

Rex’s Baby: uh i dont ,, think any of the others are on right now commander ,, so i think youre okay ,,

Cody: thank force

Rex’s Baby: but if you wanted to ,, since im here and captain rex isnt you could dm me about it if you want ?? its !! just an offer cuz it sounds like you need someone to talk to 

Cody: i uh

  
Cody: you wouldnt mind?

Rex’s Baby: not at all !!

Cody: sick 

  
  


**_New Chat_ **

_ CC-2224 added CT-5385 to the chat _

_ CC-2224 changed their name to Cody _

Cody: While we’re at it, please no ranks or titles

_ CT-5385 changed their name to Tup _

Tup: ofc !!

Tup: anyway so ,, you’re just realizing your feelings ??

Cody: uh 

Cody: Yeah. I just. I knew I liked him more than some of my other people in my life but

Cody: It's like with Rex. He’s my brother and I would never love him in a romantic sense, but we’re almost. Closer than brothers in a sense? 

Cody: I don’t know how to explain it. We’re close, closer than most people would realize, but not in a romantic sense. He’s my brother and I love him like my brother.

Tup: Yeah !! what you’re describing sounds like a QPR or a Queer Platonic Relationship. It’s like, where you’re closer than “normal” friendships but it’s not quite romantic or it’s not romantic at all

Cody: tight 

Cody: anyway uh. That’s definitely not how i feel about my general 

Cody: I like to cuddle Rex, and I’d love to cuddle Obi-Wan. But I do not look at Rex and go “wow i want to kiss him” that is, an appalling idea to me. Yet I do sometimes think that when looking at Obi-wan

  
Cody: force that was such a weird way to word that im so sorry i am

Tup: not well equipped in the emotions department?

Cody: ,, yeah that’s one way of putting it

Tup: Its okay, youre not the first one

  
Tup: unsurprisingly plent of the  _ vode  _ dont really know how to handle emotions in general. We like to think we do, but when it comes down to it we all could really use a mind healer

Cody: yeah

Tup: but from the sound of it, you’re just realizing your feelings and dont know how to handle it?

Cody: yeah! Basically. How am I,,, supposed to do anything around him now? I just. I really care about him. I really, i really love him

Tup: well you have to remember that all feelings are natural and normal 

Tup: you shouldn’t feel guilty for what you feel, and that might not be the problem youre experiencing but its one i’ve run into before 

Tup: despite what the longnecks say, youre your own person you have feelings and youre human ! youre going to experience human emotions or sentient kind emotions. Its only natural 

Tup: and about acting around him, does it really change anything if you think about it? Just because youre just now realizing it doesn’t mean you havent been feeling it. Those feelings have been around long enough for you to be able to come to terms with them. So, you just have to keep going on how you were i mean, youre just the same as before right ? it changes nothing

Cody: i.. I mean i guess. I can’t really act on it or tell him because of well. The jedi code and the regs. I suppose youre right though

Cody: thanks tup’ika, you’re a delight 

Tup: 

  
  


**_Bully Cody_ **

RexitRalph: what the fuck did i miss

Rex’s Baby: nothing buir 

  
RexitRalph: … okay i’ll accept it

Rex’s Baby: 


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> short chapter workin on other stuff

**_Bully Cody_ **

Rex’s Baby: what ,,, does acab mean?

Rex’s Baby: i was hanging out with a vod from the CG and a civie yelled that at us

Family Disappointment 2 : assigned clone at birth duh

Laserbrain: assigned cool at birth

Kaysh Mirsh Solus: assigned cute at birth

RexitRalph: Fuck cops

Beast: i mean i know but that doesn’t seem relevant 

Rex’s Baby: buir isnt ,,, fox a cop

Cody: one sec

_ Cody added CC-1010 to the chat _

_ Cody changed CC-1010’s name to ACAB _

ACAB: what

RexitRalph: I said fuck cops

Rex’s Baby: but aren’t you technically one ???

ACAB: oh.

ACAB: fuck cops

ACAB: acab means all cops are bastards by the way, tup & tano

ACAB: i may be a cop but at least I’m not abab like cody

Rex’s Babt: wh,,, what ,,

ACAB: assigned bitch at birth

Cody: I’m going to shiv you

RexitRalph: jesse is AHAB

RexitRalph: assigned himbo at birth

Rex’s Favorite: Are we not going to talk about how Tup calls Rex, Buir?

Rex’s Baby: are ,, you saying that like its a bad thing ,,, 

Rex’s Favorite: No!! It’s just cute 

Rex’s Baby: 

\---

ACAB: anyway if i get one more surprise visit im gonna commit treason

Cody: was it vos again

ACAB: yeah

Family Disappointment 2 : not that im complaining but why is fox still here

ACAB: i dont feel like leaving

Family Disappointment 2 : fair enough 

RexitRalph: eventually we’re gonna collect all of your batch huh

Cody: 

RexitRalph: please for the love of god lets keep it to you two

ACAB: i cant promise anything. Besides i was put here against my will

Cody: you love us you bitch 

ACAB: 

Cody: that doesn’t scare me 

ACAB: kot’ika

Cody: 

Kaysh Mirsh Solus: ah so this is what little brother cody looks like

Cody:

Kaysh Mirsh Solus: I am OFFENDED


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> idk what the fuck im doing ive had a whole ass thing of caffeine and im literally VIBING LETS GO BOYYYYYYYYYYYS

**_Bully Cody_ **

Beast: lads im this close to beating skyguy’s ass xoxo

Beast: but unfortunately he’s my dad so 

Beast: alas i cannot

Kaysh Mirsh Solus: Skywalker: h-

Kaysh Mirsh Solus: Tano: you are my daaaaaad you’re my dad boogie woogie woogie !

Beast: basically

RexitRalph: if you beat his ass i’ll help 

Beast: Tight 

ACAB: wow not even going to question why

RexitRalph: if ahsoka says he needs his ass whooped then he deserves it

RexitRalph: tbh even if she doesnt say it he needs it

Laserbrain: yeah p much 

Family Dissapointment2: yeah 

ACAB: aight

\----

_ ACAB changed his name to Foxy _

Foxy: :v: sup vodies   
  
  
Cody: fuck off stone

Foxy: :((( rude i’m telling alpha 17

Cody: YOU NEVER EVEN- 

Cody: *sigh*  
  


Cody: you have the moral backbone of a chocolate eclair

Beast: Hey did you know

Beast: that togrutas

Rex’s Favorite: I’m literally begging you to stop. Captain looks like he’s about to have an aneurysm. 

Foxy: who the fuck stole my bracer

Foxy: Oh. That fucker.

Will Kix Your Ass:  _ sigh  _ I fear for your medic

Foxy: Oh corran can handle whatever i do to stone

Foxy: but stone might not :)

Rex’s Baby: one fear

\----

Foxy: haha what if i started a clone rebellion against palpatine,,, haha jk,,,,, unless 

Cody: Vibe

RexitRalph: Vibe

Family Dissapointment2: Vibe

Beast: i mean,,, he do be skyguys friend tho 

RexitRalph: do u remember the rako ordeal 

  
Cody: Rex

RexitRalph: no cody u handled that okay its not like you blew up at him you just gave him the cold shoulder and then talked shit out ANYWAY 

RexitRalph: i also happened to talk to kenobi about it,,,,,,,, ahsoka did you know palpatine picked him for the mission

Beast: but like,,, he told skyguy to go after rako-

Beast: if he knew,,, then,,, why-

Beast Oh my god. 

Beast: I have to go

\------

Laserbrain: they/them pronouns today vode 

Laserbrain: also so im just vibing here 

Family Disappointment2: sparbaque sauce on your tiddies?

_ Laserbrain changed Family Disappoinemnt2’s name to Family Disappointment3 _

Family Disappointment3: yeah i saw that coming anyway continue

Laserbrain: thank

Laserbrain: SO IM VIBING THERE

  
Laserbrain: Trying to paint osme design on my enw helmet right 

Will Kix Your Ass: WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED TO THE LAST ONE

Laserbrain: IRRELEVANT CAN I TELL MY GOD DAMN STORY

Laserbrain: ANYWAY

Laserbrain: IM SITTING THERE VIBING PAINTING N SHIT

Laserbrain: i think ,,, fuckin,, ophelia? is that her??? the arc trooper with blonde hair and black armour paint? yeah anyway she comes out of the room with this pantoran lady 

Cody: ohohohoho can’t wait to bully ophelia

  
Foxy: you’re not even batchmates

Foxy: she’s not even command squad

Cody: yeah but she’s like clone force 99 we work together enough we bully each other

Laserbrain: goddamn anyway SO they’re walking down the hall, not noticing that im there but theyre whispering so kudos for themm

Laserbrain: THen opHELOA lenas over and KISSES THE GIRL 

Laserbrain: I dont even know who this pantoran lady is shes not in the senate or n e thing 

Laserbrain: then the lady sees me,, anD FUCKIN WINKS

Foxy: Wild

Cody: WIld

Will Kix Your Ass: msmmsnmsnmnsmnsmn

Beast: KSJKSJKJSKJKSJKSJKJDKJKLAJLKDJAKLDJODQJOIJDOIQ

\-----

Cody: how do we know if we’re real

Foxy: go the FUCK TO SLEEP 

Cody: 

Foxy: CODY

Cody: Fox youre up too

Fox: : okay fair but

Foxy: sleep or i’m telling alpha 17

Cody: as if that’s a threat 

Cody: also the war never sleeps and neither shall i 

Foxy: is that like your motto or something? I’ve heard you say it FIFTY TIMES THIS WEEK

Cody: yes

Foxy: I hate you

Cody: ;) 

Cody: listen im dumb of ass, home of sexual, living in a capitalist world do you think i have time for sleep 

Foxy: go to sleep or i wont send you photos of the thing wolffe doesnt want me telling you about

Cody: DEAL altho ive had like 3 cups of caff and im literally VIBRATING

Foxy: Yeah that’s the caffeine but go sleep

Cody: okay fine lov u 

Foxy: gross

Foxy: lov you too

  
  



	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> kudos to TheStageManager and ForestGreenGirl (vox your chat fics give me LIFE) for sparking my interest tonight to post another chapter <3 
> 
> ALSO I SEE THE RISE OF CHAT FICS IN THE FANDOM AND IM SO HAPPY LADS YOURE WARMING THIS COLD CRUSTACEANS HEART UP 
> 
> This chapter is only shorter than the others (With only three things) because i'm sleepie and wanted to post something before i pass out from working all week FOIWJIOFW

**_Bully Cody_ **

Kaysh Mirsh Solus: I’m changing everyone’s names bare with me

_ Kaysh Mirsh Solus changed their name to Hesse _

_ Hesse changed Family Disappointment3’s name to Fiverr _

_ Hesse changed Beast’s name to Chronic Togruta Liar  _

Chronic Togruta Liar: hey :(

_ Hesse changed RexitRalph’s name to Bitch but Blue _

_ Hesse changed Cody’s name to Bitch but Gold _

_ Hesse changed Foxy’s name to Bitch but Red _

_ Hesse changed Laserbrain’s name to Genderfluid ROYALTY _

_ Hesse changed Rex’s Favorite’s name to Echolocation _

_ Hesse changed Rex’s Baby’s name to Tup(‘ika)wear _

_ Hesse changed Will Kix Your Ass’s name to Pumped Up Kicks _

Hesse: okay i’m done enjoy :)

Bitch But Blue: bitch

  
Bitch but Gold: ass

Bitch but Red: fucker

Hesse: did 

Hesse: did you all take turns to make it say that i’m a bitch ass fucker

Bitch but Blue: maybe

Bitch but Gold: we

Bitch but Red: did

Hesse: i hate you all

Chronic Togruta Liar: i think its cute

\-----

Genderfluid ROYALTY: tupt utptup tup tup tup tup typ typu tup TUP

Genderfluid ROYALTY: also hey nm y new noame I lov e it

Genderfluid ROYALTY: but tup tup’ika lil tuppie tuP

Tup(ika)wear: sorry ori’vod! I’m here,, 

Genderfluid ROYALTY: tup’ika i love you 

Tup(ika)wear: :0 <3

Tup(ika)wear: i love u too ori'vod,,,

Genderfluid ROYALTY: can i play hwieht you r hari,,, b4 sleep,,, its SOFt abd i wanna braisd it or smth

Tup(ika)wear: ,,, ofc ori’vod,,, 

  
\----

Bitch but Gold: FUCK OBI-WAN KISSED ME AND ALL I SAID IN RESPONSE WAS "Thanks"

Bitch but Blue: Im CODY HWIOFJJFOIWJFIOWJOFI

Chronic Togruta Liar: SKJJSKJDKJAKDJKSJKJKDSJADJKSJKJK CODY 

Bitch but Red: you can't see it but i'm laughing hysterically over your dumb ass

Bitch but Gold: I know i'm a dumb gay but WHAT ARE YOU REALISICALLY GOING TO DO WHEN THE LOVE OF YOUR LIFE KISSES YOU BUT YOU HAVENT YET REALLY PROCESSED YOURE IN LOVE WITH HIM HUH????

Bitch but Gold: but force i want to kiss him again

  
  
Chronic Togruta Liar: GROSS

Bitch but Gold: shut ur bitch ass up i'm HAPPY he KIISSED Me

Tup(ika)wear: OH!!??? how !!! how did you guys get to kissing i love a good romance story hehe,,   
  
  


Bitch but Gold: I DONT KNOW BUT 

Bitch but Gold: I WAS JUST LOOKING AT HIM WHILE HE WAS MEDITATING BECAUSE I COULDNT FOCUS ON IT MYSELF AND HE OPENED HIS EYES AND SAID, "can I kiss you, my dear" AND I WAS LIKE "uh yeah" and he KISSED ME adn thne i PANICKED and said "THANKS" 

Bitch but Gold: AND THEN I LEFT 

Bitch but Red: Im literally crying 

Bitch but Red: I'm telling the other three

Bitch but Gold; fuck u fox 

Bitch but Blue: CODY IHFOIJWOIJFOIWJF

Echolocation: for the love of force please go talk to kenobi 

Pumped up Kicks: i agree with echo,,, please go talk to kenobi and Don't just leave him there

Pumped up Kicks: knowing him he probably thinks he did something wrong and upset you 

Pumped up Kicks: or he's saying that you only did it because you're required to listen to him blah blah blah all that bullshit 

Bitch but Gold: FUCK I NEED TO FIND HIM 

Fiverr: inchresting i am now 30 credits richer 

Hesse: funnily enough i am now 30 credits poorer 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> tumblr is crablad u know what to do :sunglasses:


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> not much meet, mostly cody and fox being mean to each other but i was feeling WILDIN and wrote this i promise more of the others in a bit

**_Bully Cody_ **

Hesse: simp nation…. Rise UP [](https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/713517611194908683/731006807572480020/emoji.png)[](https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/713517611194908683/731006877378543687/emoji.png)

Fiverr: rising… UP!!! [](https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/713517611194908683/731006807572480020/emoji.png)[](https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/713517611194908683/731006877378543687/emoji.png)

  
  


Bitch but Red: whomst are we simping 

Bitch but Gold: I hate you

Bitch but Red: thanks baby bitch i hate you too

Bitch but Gold: fuck face

Bitch but Red: whiney bitch

Bitch but Gold: asshole

Bitch but Red:  _ shabuir  _

Bitch but Gold: mother kriffer

Bitch but Blue: as fun as this is to watch shut the FUCK up 

Bitch but Red: anyway who are you simping

Hesse: none other  than [](https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/713517611194908683/731009110379724910/emoji.png)[](https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/713517611194908683/731009110379724910/emoji.png)mr… sheev palpatine [](https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/719580264484962394/731011900313174023/why.png) himself [](https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/713517611194908683/731009325824213082/emoji.png)

  
  


Bitch but Red: 

_ Bitch but Red has left the chat _

Bitch but Blue: I have never, in my life, heard cody laugh this much or this hard 

Bitch but Blue: he’s on the floor WHEEZING

Bitch but Gold:  _ its fucking funny  _

_ Bitch but Gold added CC-1010 “Fox” to the chat _

_ CC-1010 has left the chat _

_ Bitch but Gold added CC-1010 “Fox” to the Chat _

CC-1010: I want you all to know, from the bottom of my heart, I hate you jesse

Hesse: thanks i live to please [](https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/713517611194908683/731009762497658960/emoji.png)

Fiverr: [](https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/713517611194908683/731010897228595231/emoji.png)[](https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/713517611194908683/731010897228595231/emoji.png)jesse  can we be [](https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/713517611194908683/731011021984235610/emoji.png)[](https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/713517611194908683/731011021984235610/emoji.png) simps with benefits

Hesse:[](https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/713517611194908683/731010897228595231/emoji.png) yes[](https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/713517611194908683/731011021984235610/emoji.png)

CC-1010:

CC-1010: Please, force, can i have ONE good day

CC-1010: oh shit vos is here

Bitch but Gold: ooooo your BOYFRIEND

CC-1010: I wouldn’t be talkin mr. “thanks” cody

Bitch but Gold: but at least i have a partner and confronted my feelings [](https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/713517611194908683/731011744306036786/emoji.png)

CC-1010: oh wow so impressive! Everyone look at kot’ika all grown up :) actually talking about his feelings instead of destroying punching bags

Bitch but Gold: HEY i’ll have you KNOW training is an EFFECTIVE way of getting out anger and emotions

CC-1010: sure

Bitch but Gold: like you’re one to talk fox “i’ll repress all my emotions right here, and then one day i’ll die” clone

CC-1010: 

Bitch but Gold: oh so you’re nineteen now? Last i remembered you were 3 

CC-1010: I’m 11 so shut the fuck up

Bitch but Gold: HAHA I GOt YOU

Bitch but Gold: I AM the oldest, age 12 babey

CC-1010: 

CC-1010: di’kut it was… a joke

Bitch but Gold: (i know, I’m just continuing the joke)

CC-1010: (oh,,, sorry then) 

Bitch but Gold: (you’re good ori’vod love you)

CC-1010: (gross affection but ily2)

Bitch but Blue: Cody [](https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/713517611194908683/731009325824213082/emoji.png)[](https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/713517611194908683/731009325824213082/emoji.png) i love you too ori’vod

Bitch but Gold: shut the fuck up and get that soft shit out of here

Bitch but Blue: *sniffs* that’s fine i’ll just go back to my COMPANY 


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> shrug emojie pt 2

Chronic Togruta Liar: I CANT MF BELIEVE I MISSED SIMP HOURS

Hesse: It’s okay commander… you were simping in spirit

Chronic Togruta Liar: I go on ONE mission to coruscant with master skywalker and THIS is what i miss smh

CC-1010: speaking of, do you two need any help figuring out the bomber of the jedi temple

Chronic Togruta Liar: nah not yet at least

CC-1010: oh thank god im piled up as is 

Chronic Togruta Liar: then,,, why did u ask

CC-1010: because im legally obligated to

Chronic Togruta Liar: 

_ Bitch but Gold changed CC-1010’s name to checker of the vibes _

Checker of the vibes: nice

Checker of the vibes: speaking of 

Checker of the vibes: p sure palpatine is connected to the separatists but that’s neither here or there

Fiverr: 

Fiverr: dude you just

Fiverr: casually drop that

Checker of the vibes:  ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯

Chronic Togruta Liar: I honestly have no trust for that man after rako and some other shit

Bitch but Blue: vibe

Bitch but Gold: vibe

Pumped up Kicks: vibe

Tup(‘ika)wear: vibe

Genderfluid ROYALTY: 

Echolocation: In other news, General Skywalker has offered to upgrade my prosthetics which will be nice to have

Genderfluid ROYALTY: !!! cna i paint thme 

Echolocation: Of course :)

Fiverr: NICE i’m happy for you vod!!!

Echolocation: 

\-----

Pumped up Kicks: *slams pots and pans together*

Pumped up Kicks: IF YOU DONT KRIFFING EAT AT LEAST TWO MEALS A DAY COUNTING RATIONS, DRINK AT LEAST TWO FULL CANTEENS OF WATER, AND SLEEP FOR AT LEAST 5 HOURS I WILL PERSONALLY HOLD YOU DOWN AND INJECT A HYPO TO FORCE YOU TO STAY IN THE MEDBAY

Bitch but Blue: Cody again

Pumped up Kicks: 

Bitch but Gold: 

Pumped up Kicks: YOU BETTER BE IN YOUR COT

Bitch but Gold: i ma but im jsut awake 

Bitch but Gold: hto just barely i cant open my eyes all the way

Pumped up Kicks: 

Bitch but Gold: mm okay sleep time i can’t say up os gn ily all

Bitch but Blue: love you too ori’vod uwu

Bitch but Gold: 

Checker of Vibes: gross softness

Checker of Vibes: sleep punk 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> what can i say except *screaming eternally*


	13. Chapter 13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> i got tired and didnt put the emotes in but now you have the joy of knowing what they're called in discord for me :sob:

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is the second to last chapter my guys :v:

**_Hi its the author i forgot the name of the group chat so i’m gonna just make it beeeee_ **

**_Me and the boys looking for beans at 2 am_ **

Bitch but Gold: Boil,,, can actually mf cook damn this soup is GOOD

Fiverr: SOUP

PumpedupKicks: SOUP?????

Tup(‘ika)wear: ba’buir,,, soup,,, gibe,, soup,,

Bitch but Gold: :bobthink: what,,,,, no this is mine

Tup(‘ika)wear: ba’buir please,,, soup,,,

Hesse: ssu,,op,,,soip,,, soup,,, soop!!!!

Genderfluid ROYALTY: PSOUP SOSUUSPS SOUP !!!!!

Bitch but Gold: No!!!! It’s mine!!! You can’t have it

Tup(‘ika)wear: Ba’buir,,, not sharing his soup,,, :chickcry: just gonna let us,,, starve,,

Chronic Togruta Liar: blease ,,, give soup

CC-1010: what the fuck

Bitch but Blue: damn cody is NOT feeding the kids ig

Bitch but Gold: they can’t have my soup!!! Its mine!!!

Fiverr: sir,, blease,,, some soup

Bitch but Gold: NO!

Bitch but Gold: :bobthink: its gone

Bitch but Gold: *narrows eyes* Obi-Wan

Bitch but Blue: OOp

Tup(‘ika)wear: cannot believe ba’vodu gets soup but i dont :chickcry:

\----------

Chronic Togruta Liar: tight okay so i’m no longer a jedi,,, that’s the Tea :oop:

Bitch but Blue: oop

Bitch but Gold: oop

CC-1010: if,,,, it helps im Sorry and i literally have no memory of that but that’s no excuse please be safe

Chronic Togruta Liar: you’re good foxie, stay safe in coruscant


	14. Chapter 14

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> final chapter babeyyy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> super short idk man i jusst wantd to finish this fic

**_Me and the boys looking for beans at 2 am_ **

Chronic Togruta Liar: was anyone going to tell me that palpatine was a) dead b) the sith lord or was I supposed to figure this out from Anakin calling me in the middle of the night to have a moral, existential, and literally everything crisis

Fiverr: uhhh What? 

Chronic Togruta Liar: we stopped maul on mandalore right

Fiverr: ye

Chronic Togruta Liar: anakin called me a day later during a BREAKDOWN 

Chronic Togruta Liar: Bringing me to today

Chronic Togruta Liar: Where  _ palpatine is fucking dead????? And senator organa is the emergency chancellor??? _

Fiverr: oh yea

Fiverr: it do b like that tho

Hesse: /shrug idk what to tell you commander tano, it just happened

Chronic Togruta Liar: idk if you know this but

Chronic Togruta Liar:  _ I’m not in the loop of these things anymore :sob: _

Tup(ika)wear: do u think we’ll finally get citizenship

CC-1010: the day that happens is the day I’ll dance around with a balloon animal on my head

Bitch but gold: BET?????

Bitch but Blue: I cannot  _ wait _

**Author's Note:**

> !! hope you liked, this will have a VERY inconsistent upload schedual as this is something for fun alongside my drabbles and dad au BUT ! i have some big things in the works, one of which is the next chapter of the time travel au and something special hehehehe


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